Quitting Smoking: Day 2
Yesterday night, I bought this domain and created this new site. So that I can be in control of everything these pages don’t reach anyone who doesn’t has these links.
‘’On 12. October 2022. I got shortlisted for TATA Capital. Spent most of the night revising about Risk Management. But they apparently had come only for Credit Role. Even though the Interview had gone really fantastic. They didn’t select me as I am from a completely different domain.’’
After I got rejected. I decided to go and smoke one. Just one. It felt awful after smoking. I didn’t want to. I don’t know why I did? Probably because it seemed like yeah that is the way to celebrate a failure. But honestly that isn’t true.
It didn’t make me feel any better. Just awful.
At least I’ve smoked only one, and I don’t have any stash to go back to. And bike is still gonna take few days to get repaired. So, I have enough time to make this one per day to zero.
Just a small update. For now.
In the evening I decided to go out with few friends for dinner, but then the plan didn’t go through. My section was going out for drinks, I didn’t want to so didn’t go out with them either. Just cooked maggie and ate it. Later I had to give KT to a finance committee, did that.
When I was returning to hostel. Lights of her room were off. Meaning she is out with him someplace, sharing her time with him. Sharing her life with him. It hurt a bit. Decided to call a friend and asked him for a cigarrete.
And the daily count for today ended at 2. I so wish it didn’t hurt. But fuck it ends up making a hole in my consiousness. God why can’t I Imagine her with someone else and move on.
